Another Dark Phase

Another dark phase in my life.

I honestly thought I had hit rock bottom before — turns out, there’s still more ground beneath that.

Got scammed. Lost everything I had. Just like that.
Every single thing I worked for, gone.

And the worst part? I didn’t even see it coming. I trusted the wrong people again. Maybe that’s my curse — giving too much trust, too much faith, too much heart.

As if that wasn’t enough, my second marriage is slowly crumbling into dust right in front of me.
And this time, I don’t even have a villain to blame — no fight, no betrayal, no explosion. Just quiet detachment. A slow, suffocating fade.

My own husband — the man who once said he couldn’t imagine his world without me — now says he’s “lost the spark.”
Just like that.
No warning, no explanation, no effort to fix what’s broken.
He said he doesn’t feel the chemistry anymore. That we don’t have anything in common.

I stared at him, trying to process how love can evaporate so cleanly — like it never existed.
And in that moment, I realized something terrifying: you can love someone so deeply, so fiercely, and still end up being the only one fighting to stay.

He didn’t yell. He didn’t cry. He just said it as if he was announcing the weather.
Like my heart wasn’t breaking right in front of him.

And I stood there, frozen — too tired to scream, too numb to cry.
Because how do you fight for something when the other person already decided you’re not worth the effort?

I’ve been trying to rebuild my life from scratch, but it feels like the universe keeps handing me wreckage instead of hope.

Every time I start to breathe, another storm comes crashing in.
I’m exhausted. Not just physically, but spiritually.
Tired of surviving, tired of pretending to be okay, tired of being strong because apparently, I don’t get to fall apart.

People love to say, “Everything happens for a reason.”
Well, I’d love to know the reason behind being stripped of everything — money, love, trust, peace — all at once.

Maybe this is another lesson.
Or maybe life just enjoys watching me burn and call it growth.

Either way, I’m here again.
At the edge.
Trying to hold myself together with shaking hands.
Trying to remind myself that I’ve survived worse.
Trying to believe that someday, this will stop hurting.

But tonight, I’m just tired.
Tired of being resilient.
Tired of being tested.
Tired of starting over.

So if the world’s listening — I surrender.
Just let me rest.
For once.