I am done

I am done torture myself like this.

This kinda thing I did to myself wasn't healthy and will make me sick eventually.

I am done grieving for you. My body doesn't deserve to be treated like this

No more laying in bed all day long, no more trying not to eat anything in a days, no more spending a day in home without wanting to do absolutely nothing.

Yeah I need to stop doing things like this.

If he can move on that kinda fast, having a baby girl as soon as possible, found the woman that he truly love (gosh i just pretend that I didn't write it down).

He is move on and I should do the same damn thing. No more hiding in somewhere else.

I am coming back home next week and soon I am gonna file for divorce.

Screw what other people think about my marriage life. I know what kinda marriage life I really want and so far my marriage life right now is so not what I have in mind.

So screw if other people think that I am getting divorce because he is having a child from some stupid whore, because he isn't happy with me, because I can't give him a baby, because I can't be the wife that he have in mind, because he got broke (jobless right now). 

Screw that. Screw whatever they have in mind about my life.

I don't have to explain myself every time when  someone else start asking where your husband (soon to be ex husband), why the two of you aren't together again, why can you just forgive him.

Screw whatever opinion they have in their tinny little brain (if they have one though).

As for now, all that I care is that I live my life to the fullest with all of my best friend and my family.

I couldn't care less with other might think of me.

It's my life so I am gonna live with my very own decision every step of the way.

I ain't gonna sugarcoat my life in front of everyone but I ain't gonna tell them the whole detail why I am taking this kinda decision or the whole kinda story.